Sunday, May 19, 2013

My last "last"

I have decided that I am not going to think in "lasts" anymore.  It makes me sad to think of the "last day of school," the "last time I will see my students," the "last time I will hang out with my college friends," and such.  It is easy to get into the habit of thinking this way.  For the most part, they are true statements, at least in the short term.  I know that I can get stuck on these thoughts as they are, and I would much rather have a positive outlook. 


I am going to start thinking in "firsts."  For example, this is the first time in 8 years that I have been able to experience life without a car.  For those of you not from Wyoming, we have no public transportation system.  When my brother drove off to school this morning in my car, I became the only person my age I know without a car.  It is also the first time my brother has been able to drive himself to school.  See, this is thinking in firsts.  (Side note to Ben: Take care of my car this year! )

Some other firsts I will be experiencing in the next month:
  • First time seeing France
  • First time chaperoning an international trip
  • First time my dog gets to spend more than a weekend at my parent's house without me
  • First end of the school year since graduation where I know what I'm doing for the beginning of the next one
  • First time going to church in at least 10 years when I'm not "on duty" for something
  • First time visiting New York State
  • First time since High School that I won't have my cell phone or internet access for an extended period of time
  • First time talking to my entire congregation as peers, and not as the person in charge of the kids

Looking at my world as a series of "firsts" makes it less scary.  Yes, I am still nervous about all of the unknowns in my future.  Yes, it will still make me sad to say goodbye to my school kids at the end of the year, and my friends and family.  However, I have so many new and exciting things going on that it just doesn't make any sense to dwell on the "lasts."  Here's to the beginning of something wonderful!

Kuleta juu!

1 comment:

  1. Dear Heidi...there are, indeed, many 'firsts' coming at you almost all at once! There is a sense of having to unplug from your former things, like connections to a hub or...tentacles of an octopus...before you can step into those new, exciting places. Rev. Daphne said this at last week's SAS: " in God is more important than faith", at least that's how I remember the statement. I don't know about your faith--that's so very personal-- but from where I sit, your trust in God seems to be healthy!

    The Lord be with you....I'm so excited for your journey!

    Bobbie Hostetler